Alexander, the Business Consultant, and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad COVID Day

I LOVED to read the children’s book, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day to my son every night. It was my favorite children’s book, right up there with Dr. Seuss’s Fox in Sox - two of the bravest and edgiest books ever published. My son said that the incessant reading and re-reading of these two unrecognized masterpieces were the tipping point for him to leave the nest, and I mean STAT. Child-rearing habits aside, this whole COVID situation can be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day for business consultants that are used to being on-site and getting stuff down. But rather than being the worst of days, they could be some of the best of days, Knox on Box.

Yes, I know. I am one of those annoying nonspecific optimists that can be insufferable during bad times. I hear this quite a lot. I am optimistic, and you...are not. I do not mean to trivialize the suffering and sacrifice that a lot of folks are living with; rather, I am saying that sometimes the glass truly is half full rather than half empty. The great part is that it is half full of fantastic craft beer if you have the right mindset.

So, after you have taken care of yourself and your loved ones, I challenge you to make your next priority keeping your clients happy. Believe it or not, this is still a great time to have close contact with your clients, it just requires fresh and creative solutions rather than sitting in your sweatpants and feeling sorry for yourself. Stuff still needs to get done, so cowboy up and find a way to get it done. Open your viewfinder, and you will discover that it can be surprisingly easy it is to connect and influence remotely. Another tip: I would recommend not managing strictly to your contract. Do what has to be done, regardless of it not being in your swim lane, specified in the contract, or in your Statement of Work.

I love, Love, LOVE being on client sites. It recharges me and helps me climb Maslow’s Pyramid. However, these are remarkable times, so I am getting to spend more quality time in my luxury basement apartment - underneath a herd of elephants. No fooling. And Rap. Lots of Rap music. I caught myself rapping in some of my zoom meetings unintentionally and unironically. Despite all these artistic challenges, I was surprised at how much I could contribute remotely. I took the sage advice of that guy[i] who raps on Rebecca Black's Friday: “Fast Lane, Switchin’ Lanes[ii].” He is correct. It is time to shake things up and keep client satisfaction as king. Switch lanes and start being helpful despite the COVID lockdown. Constant, positive connection helps develop trust so that they feel that their success is your goal, not merely billable hours.

While we are “switchin’ lanes,” here is a tip for all you leaders, managers, and bosses out there. If Client Satisfaction is the King, then Employee Satisfaction is the Empress. Unhappy employees = unhappy clients. Unhappy employees have the same effect on your business that COVID-19 has had on small restaurants and theaters. I know this empirically, having worked for small businesses over the last decade. I know DNA deep that most employees fear the unknown more than bad news. Quick, honest communication about the state of the company, prospects drying up, a fiscal haircut to keep the lights on, or even the need for furloughs is better than a late, yet precisely delivered communication. Be transparent, quick with bad news, sincere, and present for your employees. Share your corporate and personal game plan to adapt or mitigate the fallout from COVID crisis. Spend the time to understand each employee:

• Do they have any loved ones with COVID-19? Or other illnesses?
• Do they have an adequate home office?
• How is their internet connectivity, laptop, applications?
• Do they have a spouse or partner also working at home? Is that a challenge?
• Are they trying to work in a shared and crowded space?
• Number of small children at home?

The point of this drill is to understand how the company, partner, and manager can alleviate the situation. Even a little thing like touching base via WebEx, flexible hours, or a daily meal voucher can take the pressure off a stressed household trying to keep it together.

This is a golden time to look internally at the talent on your team. Now is the time to speak openly and honestly with your employees on their career path. Let employees work on their careers by taking that training, class, or certification while things are slow. Let employees know where they stand. Are they on track? Do they need a nudge in a different direction?

Onboarding new talent is critical to a healthy bottom line. The forced COVID isolation is a great time to review your onboarding structure. Fast Company has a fantastic article[iii] on how to do remote onboarding since “well begun is half done!”[iv] Find the right coach for the new employee. Look at the training and company culture from the new hire’s vantage point. Ask earnestly for their opinions and observations. Will you improve the onboarding process and how can you make it better?

Are there new business opportunities to pursue outside your company’s comfort zone? The world is forever changed. It is time to explore new revenue streams. Hit up your team for fresh ideas and let them help you discover that $50 bill hiding in the couch cushions. Look forward to when things will open and try to imagine how your business will take advantage of the rush to normalcy (if there is a normal anymore).

Additionally, do the hard work and press your team for weekly remote meetings and forecasts. Make decisions based on hard facts and not emotions. Look at changes to your business and how that impacts the budget. This is a no brainer but look at non-billable and travel expenses. What can the company do without? With even a semi-accurate forecast you can balance your resources, demand, and let people know ahead of time if difficult decisions must be made. If you have a forecast, it is easier to balance and load share the different demands (finances, resourcing, contracts). A forecast will underscore the need to create new opportunities, revenue streams, and the need for coherent data. Share your findings with the team and let them be part of the solution. Clean up your CRM, get those emails and phone numbers updated, and start working your magic with your potential and existing customers.

There are not many home runs in the services industry right now. Sure, theoretically the home runs are out there somewhere, but wouldn’t you rather try to win the game rather than trying to hit a home run at every at bat? Michael Lewis detailed this concept masterfully in Moneyball.[v] Winning, client satisfaction, and happy employees are a day-to-day effort, just like they are in Major League Baseball. The teams that win reliably get on base. It is singles and doubles that will get the revenue, not the rare home runs. Get on base: tighten up your processes, keep clients happy, your employees satisfied and informed, and get ready to run like a cooped-up dog when the door opens wide. Most of all, stay well and take care of each other. After all, we are Americans and remember that “we did not descend from fearful men.”[vi] We will get through this.

[i] Patrice “Pato” Wilson

[ii] Seriously. At the highest volume setting. At 10 pm at night. On a school night. And why is Pato rapping about passing a school bus? Why is he dressed like a chauffeur in the middle of the video? Why?

[iii] Profico, Renato,” How to Onboard New Employees When You Are All Working from Home,” FastCompany.com, March 21, 2020, accessed online: https://www.fastcompany.com/90480127/how-to-onboard-new-employees-when-youre-all-working-from-home?hlkid=1935fecbceb248cf9b8cc658c8952ca5&hctky=11877000&hdpid=
35af2a33-f600-45df-ae9b-c56a6422b5ba, [accessed April 23, 2020].

[iv] Originally attributed to Aristotle, but I poached it from watching Walt Disney’s 1964 film, Mary Poppins, in my gravy stained sweatpants (while listening to Rap upstairs).

[v] Lewis, Michael, Moneyball: The Art of Winning an Unfair Game, W.W. Norton and Co., Inc., New York, NY, 2003, ISBN 0-393-05765-8.

[vi] Edward R. Murrow, available online: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/222611-we-must-not-confuse-dissent-with-disloyalty-we-must-remember, [accessed April 23, 2020].